Random

Michael is taking a monster (as in, going on three hours!) nap today.  I actually finished what I absolutely needed to do for work (and after working 8+ hours over my weekend on top of two graduations and, you know, a toddler, I am so very done until I go into the office tomorrow) and so thought I'd take a minute to post a couple pictures.

Michael loves pretty much every kind of fruit (with strawberries, bananas and blueberries holding a special place in his heart), so watermelon has been a hit from its first introduction last summer.  He's grown so much (well duh, that's what they do).

First taste of watermelon, 6 months old

Almost a year later, now he's one of the big kids,
eating with cousin Caraline

Well hello, Mr. Blue-Eyes

Mmmmmm, watermelon!

I know I'm supposed to enjoy every moment and savor every little detail because this will pass so quickly and he'll never be this little again, but when he goes from turning the pages of the missalette oh-so-gently to ripping them out with absolutely no warning, I find myself thinking it's okay if he grows up a bit.  Quickly.

And then he goes and does something like this, and for a split second I think I could just love this age forever:

He's very into climbing right now, but (thankfully) there's a limited number of furniture pieces he can climb by himself.  Apparently his train table is one of them...

Still sleeping... dare I take a shower?!

7 Quick Takes (vol. 3)

--- 1 ---

Michael and I arrived home from Lincoln on Tuesday.  It was hard (as always) to say goodbye to my parents and grandparents, but both M and I are ecstatic to be reunited with Alex. 

--- 2 ---

Have you ever given up on a lost item, only to have it restored to you when least expected?  Michael lost a shoe on one of our evening walks a few weeks ago (he was in the stroller--my powers of observation may fail drastically at times, but I hope I would notice if my toddler were walking around with only one shoe!).  We retraced our route the next day, but to no avail.  I gave up all hopes of finding the lost sandal, but then Wednesday evening on our walk lo! and behold--the missing sandal was sitting on top of one of the mile-marker posts on the trail.  Good thing I hadn't gotten around to tossing the one we still had.

--- 3 ---

So I guess I owe the coyotes an apology... I had just assumed that they ate/stole the shoe and that's why I couldn't find it the day after we lost it.

--- 4 ---

With all of the hype over the North Carolina amendment banning same-sex "marriage," I felt compelled to write a blog post.  Why?  And it gets worse... the purpose of the post was to (attempt to) communicate Church teaching on homosexuality and how it's not something the Church can just change or ignore, I decided to post a link to the blog on Facebook.  Why, oh why oh why?!  Well, I wrote it to share knowledge, not just for the pleasure of enjoying my own rhetoric, so I had to get it out there.  So far the comments on Facebook have been surprisingly civil, but I am still waiting for the inevitable wrathful "You are an awful, stupid, brainwashed bigot for saying x, y, and z, and what about a, b, and c, and how can you hate homosexuals when you condone pedophilia?!"   Which of course will be followed by a lament that I am obviously too immature to dialogue on an issue when I point out that I didn't actually say x, y, and z, and that a, b, and c are irrelevant to the discussion at hand, and that claiming that I (or any Catholic) condone pedophilia simply being Catholic is an ad hominem attack.

--- 5 ---

That said, here's the post.  It took me three days to write it, multiple reviews by my husband, and hours of cringing every time I look at Facebook since I posted it--only to find out that after trying to avoid offensive or derogatory wording I actually gave great offense by referring to the "homosexual lifestyle."  If you think I'm a wretched hopeless bigot after reading it, please tell me nicely...

--- 6 ---

But after reading that (if you dared), you should check out Fr. Walter Ciszek's autobiography With God in Russia.  I'm 100 pages in and absolutely riveted.  It reads like a Tom Clancy novel, but with only one plot line (okay, so not much like Tom Clancy... but it has Communists and spies).

--- 7 ---

And in other news... it's Friday!  Oh hooray, hooray hooray!  And Mother's Day this weekend, which means that tomorrow I'm getting absolutely spoiled with an amazing dinner that the Crane men are preparing for their wives (okay, that made us sound like a weird inter-married cult... that my husband, brothers-in-law, and father-in-law are preparing for my mother-in-law, sisters-in-law, and moi).  Now if only I could recover from answering comments about homosexuality all day with a really strong gin and tonic...

Quick Takes are being hosted by Hallie Lord this week--check them out! 

Live and Let Die: Why the Catholic Church can't endorse same-sex "marriage"

Both leading up to and in the wake of the approval of the North Carolina amendment banning same-sex “marriage,” I've seen any number of posts on Facebook calling on Christians to be "real Christians" and live and let live, stop discriminating, etc.  I want to address two main points concerning this type of argument to show how for a Christian to endorse the homosexual lifestyle would actually be to "live and let die" rather than "live and let live."  The first is to give a simple explanation of what the Catholic Church actually teaches on homosexuality, and the second is to take a quick look at what it actually means to ask Christians to accept and support the homosexual lifestyle.

This is not an argument for the Catholic Church's position on homosexuality and same-sex "marriage."  That is a much longer conversation which I am willing to have with anyone who is interested, but it is not my purpose here.  

Let me say first that I have several friends and family members who have identified themselves as homosexuals, and I love you each oh-so-dearly.  I'm making every attempt to say this in a way that will not be offensive to you.  I am not judging you.  In fact, although the Church makes definitive judgments about the morality of certain acts, the Church also prohibits me (or anyone else, from the Pope on down) from making a particular judgment about the state of your soul (Catechism of the Catholic Church 1861).  I just want to say something about what the Catholic Church teaches about the homosexual lifestyle.  Maybe you've heard this before, but if not then I'm sorry it has taken this long for someone to tell you!

In a sense, the call for Christians to “live and let live”—insofar as it means to treat others with respect and dignity—is valid.  The Catholic Church calls us to love every human being, whether we agree with them or not.  In fact, the Catechism of the Catholic Church states that, "The number of men and women who have deep-seated homosexual tendencies is not negligible. ... They must be accepted with respect, compassion, and sensitivity. Every sign of unjust discrimination in their regard should be avoided.  These persons are called to fulfill God's will in their lives and, if they are Christians, to unite to the sacrifice of the Lord's Cross the difficulties they may encounter from their condition" (CCC 2358, emphasis mine).  So acting on homosexual tendencies is a sin, but failing to treat homosexuals with love and respect is also a sin.

The confusing part for so many people is that there is a difference between loving and respecting a person who thinks differently and ignoring or discounting that difference in belief altogether.  The Church calls us to love and respect one another, but at the same time not to ignore what Scripture and Tradition teach about marriage.  Loving someone doesn't necessarily mean endorsing their lifestyle.  In fact, when you see that someone you love is acting in a dangerous or self-destructive manner, you won't encourage that behavior!  The Church loves her children, and so does not want them to remain in the self-destructive pattern of sin--she will not simply sit back and live and let die!

Believe it or not, the Church doesn't endorse the homosexual lifestyle (and cannot support same-sex "marriage") because the Church wants everyone to be really, truly happy.  This may sound bizarre, but it's true.  To put it simply (I hope), the Church believes that God created the human person with a specific end in mind--to find our ultimate happiness and fulfillment in Him (CCC 1).  All the "rules and regulations" of Catholicism aren't there to control or limit us--they are more like a user guide to the human person.  The user guide for my new laptop battery tells me not to drive a nail through the battery--not because the people at Toshiba are mean and power-hungry, but because they want my laptop battery to function correctly and not explode (or whatever it would do if I hammered a nail through it... anyone know?).

In the same way, the Church tells us--based on God's revelation through Scripture and Tradition--that there are certain correct "operating conditions" for sex--among them that it must be within a marriage between one man and one woman, and that it must be open to bringing forth new life.  Not because the Church hates homosexuals or polygamists or people using contraception, but because--according to the world-view which is inherent to the Catholic Church's identity--sex outside of these correct "operating conditions" is intrinsically damaging to the persons involved.  This is why living a homosexual lifestyle is (and always has been, see Leviticus 18:22 and Romans 1:26-28, for example) considered a sin (a "rejection of God and opposition to him," CCC 386)--it is a rejection of God's "operating instructions" for human sexuality.  (It’s also important to note, however, that just as experiencing the temptation to any other sin is not itself sinful, so also experiencing homosexual tendencies is not sinful if they are not embraced or acted upon.)

Now remember, this is not an argument for whether the Church is right or wrong.  This is also not a comprehensive examination of the Church's teachings on the human person, human sexuality, and marriage.  But when you boil it down, the Church teaches (and always has taught) that God created man.  He created man to be happy.  Man can only be happy by attaining the goal for which he was created.  A homosexual (or promiscuous, or contraceptive) lifestyle works against the goal for which man was created.  Therefore, regardless of the emotions in the moment, man cannot ultimately be happy in that kind of lifestyle.

You might disagree with the Church's teachings on homosexuality, and that's fine.  You're welcome to disagree.  But hopefully this helps you know more accurately with what exactly it is you're disagreeing.  The Catholic Church neither promotes nor condones hateful words or actions toward anyone, including homosexuals.  The Catholic Church calls for an attitude of love, respect, and compassion toward those who experience homosexual tendencies, regardless of whether or not they act on them.  The Catholic Church recognizes that it can be a huge burden to have homosexual tendencies and chose to live in accordance with Church teaching--and yet she still calls people to this life out of a sincere desire for their well-being and happiness.

I know that a lot of Christians fail miserably at loving and respecting those living a homosexual lifestyle.  Some of you reading may have experienced this firsthand-- I hope I've never been the source, but I want to apologize if I have, and also on behalf of all those who have failed you.  But while you have every right to demand that Christians treat you with the dignity that you fully deserve—please understand that asking Christians to endorse same-sex "marriage" is essentially asking us to change what we believe about 'life, the universe, and everything' (to steal a phrase from Douglas Adams).  Literally.  If marriage doesn't have to be between one man and one woman, then 2000 years of Christian Tradition are wrong.  Scripture isn't really inspired by God and inerrant.  The Catholic Church isn't who she says she is.  Being Christian doesn't really mean what we've always said it means.

You might agree with all of those statements--and you're welcome to try to convince me of them.  Know the Church's position, argue against it logically, and let's have a discussion!  But please, don't expect me to buy the line that “real Christians will support homosexuals in their lifestyle because it's the loving thing to do.”  Whether you believe that the Catholic Church receives her identity directly from God or not, at the very least she has the right to define her own identity.  The Catholic Church has defined what it means to be truly Catholic, and that includes adhering to a worldview in which marriage cannot be other than between one man and one woman.  Those who are demanding that Christians support same-sex "marriage" should at least acknowledge that they are asking Christians to redefine what it means to be Christian. 

Because if we truly believe what the Church teaches about 'life, the universe, and eveything,' then we as Christians are failing miserably if we do not share that message (always with love--no matter how tempting it is to beat someone over the head with it).  We say we believe that we know the Way, the Truth, and the Life--the key to ultimate happiness.  We also say we are called to love everyone.  So if I believe I have the key to ultimate happiness, and I say that I love you, and yet when I see you living in a way contrary to what I firmly believe to be your best interests and I say nothing (or worse, I encourage you in that behavior)--I am a complete hypocrite.  This is no excuse for sharing the truth without love (or misrepresenting the truth, such as claiming to know that all homosexuals or any other specific person/group is going to hell).  It is simply an explanation of why I, as a Christian, cannot stand by and live and let die.  From the Christian worldview, there is no "live and let live" option in this sense.
For the Church, this actually isn't an issue of "letting" same-sex couples get married.  It's simply a matter of what marriage actually is or is not.  The Church is neither the author nor the editor of marriage--therefore the Church has no authority to redefine marriage to mean something other than what God has defined it as: a permanent union between one man and one woman.

I welcome your input--but please keep all comments civil!

7 Quick Takes (vol. 2)

--- 1 ---

Yes, I'm late.  But I have a good excuse--Michael and I are visiting my parents, and much too busy doing fun stuff like going to the zoo and playing in the yard and taking a 3 1/2 hour nap yesterday (!!!) to get a blog post out on time.  My grandparents are visiting as well, so it's a full house and Michael has all the attention his social little heart could desire.  I'm getting just as spoiled as he is--my parents have been getting Michael when he wakes up in the morning and letting me sleep in.  Luxury!

--- 2 ---

Michael enjoyed his first visit to the zoo.  He's been pointing and saying "da!" consistently whenever he sees a dog, and I was so proud.  But at the zoo every animal was "da!"--the fish, the polar bear, the tigers... but of course he's still the most brilliant child ever ;)

"Da!" aka polar bear

"Da!" aka tiger with Grandpa

Some welcome relief from the warm day in the new
fountain in  front of the aquarium

--- 3 ---

It's been a great couple days for firsts.  Michael also got his first haircut.  It was somewhat overdue, as you may be able to tell from this bath time picture the night before the big event:

Michael had a blast while Mom and I got our hair cut.  He was fascinated watching Teresa cut my hair, and then he was thrilled to get to play on this super-cool fire truck (notice the hair conveniently swept to the side so it's out of his eyes).

And when it came time for Michael's turn he held perfectly still while Teresa trimmed his hair.  He looks much less like a little vagabond child now!

I didn't keep any hair... does that make me a bad mother?

--- 4 ---

Speaking of motherhood (because I feel like I need at least the semblance of a segue, even for quick takes), hello 2nd trimester!  Bring on the energy!

--- 5 ---

And bring on the baby bump.  I'm still at that awkward phase where my regular pants don't fit anymore, but I'm not showing enough to be obviously pregnant.  If you don't know I'm expecting it just looks like an impressive beer belly.

--- 6 ---

I don't mind people asking if we planned this pregnancy, because it gives me a chance to talk about being open to life and letting God be in control (even if it's as simple as exposing someone to the phrase "open to life" for maybe the first time).  But I have decided that if anyone asks if this one was a "surprise" my answer will be "Nope--we definitely know what makes babies, so no surprises there."  Awkward enough?

--- 7 ---

And in case you were worried, I did find sandals!  I should have written a whiny blog post weeks ago--then maybe I would have found them sooner.

They are perfect, and they were even a reasonable price.  Hooray!

And so now I should probably go get ready for the wedding--the last the the bride needs is for her personal attendant to be late :)

For more Quick Takes (that were actually on time), visit Jen at Conversion Diary!

Sole Searching

I consider myself to be a fairly reasonable person when it comes to shoes.  I like shoes, but my closet isn't overflowing with them.  I generally wear a pair of shoes until they are nearing the end of their useful life before replacing them (although even after replacing them I sometimes often hold on to them until they literally fall apart because, well, that one skirt just looks better with my old brown flats than my new ones!).  I'm willing to pay for quality shoes, but I refuse to spend exorbitant amounts of money on footwear.

Until now.  Now, I'm about ready to pay anything for a pair of brown sandals.  Because, apparently, I am absolutely, completely, unreasonably high maintenance when it comes to brown sandals.

My last pair of brown sandals lasted me for almost six years.  I should have replaced them last summer, but I just didn't want to deal with it.  This summer I have no choice—part of the sole has fallen off one of them, and I just don't think duct tape can fix it this time.  So about five weeks ago I started my search for new brown sandals.  I wasn't feeling too picky—just something not too expensive, dressy, fairly comfy, and little to no heel.  Easy peasy, right?

Ha.

Five weeks, countless hours of hunting, 9+ stores, and sanity-I-didn't-have-to-spare later, still no sandals.  After the first round of hitting the stores I expanded my search parameters to: less than $100, somewhat dressy, won't kill my feet if I wear them for an hour, and a heel no higher than two inches.  Thinking that now I was being open-minded enough that surely I could find something, I headed out for round two of the hunt.  I probably could have found something along those lines, but apparently the final straw was that I wanted brown sandals—not beige, not red-brown, but just plain ol’ dirt brown sandals.  Apparently I have absolutely no sense of style whatsoever, because these sandals simply do not exist. 

I did see one pair that looked quite promising, but I wouldn’t even let myself try them on after looking at the price tag.  Please tell me it is reasonable to not want to pay more than $100 (or even that much!) for sandals.  Am I completely out of my mind?

All of this would be frustrating but not disastrous, except for the fact that I’m headed to Lincoln for a friend’s wedding tomorrow and—you guessed it—my dress is brown.  It’s supposed to be in the 80s, and I don’t want to wear my flats.  So time is running out.  What’s a girl to do?  Do I subject myself to one more vexing round of fruitless searching?  Do I settle for something I’m going to absolutely hate by the end of the summer?  Do I go ahead and pay $100+ for the perfect pair (maybe—they probably won’t even fit right) and not let myself buy a new pair of sandals for the next 10 years (and at that price they had darn well better last that long!)?  Do I go barefoot at the wedding, because everyone’s supposed to be looking at the bride and not her personal attendant anyway?

Heaven help me when my black sandals wear out…