Sunday, May 10, 2015

Top 10 Reasons My 4 Year Old is Out of Bed--You Won't Believe Number 6!

Sorry, I couldn't resist. Please tell me I'm not the only one who finds internet headlines ridiculous and obnoxious. And yet they are so ubiquitous that I find myself thinking in them... ugh.

Regardless, I really do have 10 reasons to share for why my 4 year old is not in his bed (as he should be). Whether or not number 6 blows your mind... well, nobody else on the internet gets sued for false advertising in their headlines, right? ;)

Without further ado:

10) (any time) "I have to go potty!" Let's just get the obvious out of the way, shall we? But really, no complaints here as I would far rather take him to the bathroom kick Alex out of bed to take him to the bathroom than change his sheets!

9) (3am) "I had a dream that I talked to a stranger and he spit on me." What?! Obviously we need to have another talk about not talking to strangers, but not in the middle of the night!

8) (4am) "I heard ghost/monster/something else noises in the wall." This one always makes me sad because I hate the thought of him being scared... but he gets up and comes into our room to tell us, so he's obviously not too scared. And they have a sound machine, so he can't even hear the house settle or cars outside.

7) (15 minutes after being tucked in) "I can't sleep. Liam's talking to me." He would stop talking to you if you would stop talking to him!

6) (2am) "Daddy! Liam's not in his crib!" Note: Liam has never (knock on wood) climbed out of his crib. After Alex took M back to his room: "Oh, there he is!"

5) (usually the second time he's up after being tucked in) "My covers are in a mess!" Your covers would stay perfectly arranged if you would just stay in bed!

4) (5 minutes after being tucked in) "My bed is broken!" The fitted sheet had come untucked from one corner. Slightly.

3) (5 minutes after being tucked in) "It's being a rough night." It wouldn't be half so rough if you would stay in bed long enough to fall asleep! But let's pray your Guardian Angel prayer anyway...

2) (5 minutes after being tucked in) "I'm having rough dreams." Pretty sure you haven't been having any dreams yet, buddy. But let's pray your Guardian Angel prayer anyway...

1) "Can I be awake?" No! It is still dark outside! Go back to bed and stay there, please!


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